The real 12 days of Christmas

  Miss Sara Truelove
Utah, USA
December 31

Dear Sam:

When I opened the door there were actually six geese a-laying on my front steps. So you’re back to the birds again, huh? Those geese are huge! And it was bird poop that they were laying..complete with a large count of coloform bacteria. Where will I ever keep them? The neighbors are complaining. The police came by with a formal complaint, and I can’t sleep through all the racket. I guess I have my own noise-makers for the new years eve celebration tonight.Please stop. NO MORE BIRDS!!Cordially,

Cowgal

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